McCOY'S SOLILOQUY
Well, Spock, you finally blew it this time. For all the times I've been able to pull you out of trouble, pull you back from death's door at the last possible second, you finally did it this time. OK, you saved the whole damn ship and all who sail in her, in a typically unselfish act of heroism, your altruism and loyalty to Jim coming through when we were in the worst jam we've ever been in. There really was no way out, but you found a way. I heard you say to Jim "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few - or the one". Quite true, and you achieved that end by what you did. But what about the needs of the 'one'? Your own particular one? If I'm feelin' this bad about losin' you, how in space is he feelin'? But there's nothin' I can do for him just now, we all must face death and grief in our own way. I reckon he'll want to be alone with his memories - but I'm worried about him - will he want to go on without you by his side? I said to Jim that you're really not dead as long as we remember you. I know neither he nor I will ever forget you - how could we? Anyway, must try to get some rest now, my shoulder still hurts from where you gave me the neck pinch to put me out of action - if only I hadn't looked away - I should've guessed you'd pull that one on me - ah, nice to get horizontal for a while - maybe I'll just close my eyes for a few minutes ...
*REMEMBER.*
Huh? What was that? Must've dozed off - could've sworn I heard Spock's voice, but that's impossible, he's ...
*REMEMBER.*
Ah! Am I goin' mad? Is my grief for him makin' me hear voices? A voice I know I'll never hear again? But it was Spock's voice. Remember. Remember what? It's important, I know it is ...
*REMEMBER.*
Maybe if I relax, try to sleep again ... it's no good, when I try to sleep, I can't. Images - flashing through my mind.
*CLIMB THE STEPS.*
Steps? What steps? Maybe if I go to his cabin ...
Damn! Jim's sealed it off. But the doorcall is programmed to accept my request for entry. I must go in ...
I'm sitting here, I don't know why, sitting in meditation, just like Spock. Dimly I hear the alarm sounding, someone on the other side of the door.
*CLIMB THE STEPS, JIM. CLIMB THE STEPS OF MOUNT SELEYA.*
I hear my/Spock's voice saying. Jim's clutching me, shaking me but I feel ... so strange.
No! Don't sedate me! Listen to me! Listen to what I'm saying! There's something important I must tell you! No I'm not going mad! I must return - return to Mount Seleya!